Let it Rain

I feel strangely relieved that the sun is not out today. Maybe it's not so strange. What the hell, we're still a week away from spring. Growing up on the East Coast, I always assumed it was natural to have four distinct seasons. Winter was cold and summer was hot - that doesn't seem to apply any longer. I'll admit that I don't truly understand global warming, but from what I've observed in the last decade there is something majorly askew. The planet is losing its grip on stability. And it affects us all, I believe, both physically and emotionally. All those pretty flowers that we've been glorying in for the past few weeks are likely now to shrivel up. They were tricked into blooming too soon. Perhaps we were too. Hopefully, now we can settle back into a more normal pattern. Enjoy the freshness of the rain and the cool air - though it's probably too late to replenish the snow packs that provide our water the rest of the year. Why am I going on like this? Such complaining about a few sunny days. You can't win for losing, you say. All I know is that I've felt, in my gut, that something is terribly wrong. Perhaps, it's only my own chemistry that makes me uneasy. But I think it actually goes deeper. I've found in going through chemo, that I do have deeper emotional reactions than I did before, but I've also found that those reactions are not entirely about the drugs. I'm disturbed by these aberrations in the weather because of my own heightened sensitivities and because there's clearly something in me that doesn't love a sunny day (which concerns me) and I'm disturbed because these patterns are truly signs that our environment is breaking down in some serious ways and that the bill is shortly coming due.